The Days After..

Many days have passed since my arrival at the shore of the Red Sea.  At first, I was accepting of my circumstances.  I continued pursuing my interests and keeping busy with activities.  This helped to keep my focus away from the magnitude of my obstacle.  However, as the days went by, memories began to creep in.  The sorrow and disappointment of my previous attempts, became a reality. 

Eventually, I began to question God.  Why here again? What is the purpose of reminding me of what I could not have? Pain clouded my judgment.  Nothing seemed to have change except that I was more aware of the impossible.  I broke down.  I stopped asking questions.

All became silent.  In the days that follow, I approached the Lord again.  This time I exposed my broken heart, my deepest thoughts, the anguish, and despair.  The Lord heard me.  I know he already knew this, but I needed to share with him my open wounds, my open scars and their constant pain.  That’s when He decided to speak. 

He revealed why he had created the route back to this shore.  He explained he already knew what I could not bring myself to face, my brokenness.  He confirmed that in order for healing to be poured, I would have to cross the Red Sea.

  

In the days that followed I have began to take steps in preparation for the rest of my journey.  I have trusted his guidance, taken risks and given my heart fully to his plan.  Even though I have not arrived yet, the Promise Land does not seem so distant anymore.  I believe that my baby steps are getting me closer. My promise land!  I cannot wait to see it!